Lecture Notes
"Go For It: A mini workshop on how to work toward achieving your goals"
Sr. Saiyyidah Zaidi
MCA Santa Clara, CA
5/9/14
In school I worked really hard but I didn’t get the best grades. But somehow I got to university. I studied architecture but didn’t do that well. Then one day I got a really powerful reminder from Allah - I got into a massive car accident. I ended up in a wheel chair - not being able to work or go to the gym. Allah reminded me - this is not actually what your life is supposed to be about, you need to make some changes. It was a reminder that I had the skill set to do more in life. This shows you that anyone can do anything - it’s just about deciding. So when I was in the wheelchair, I said to myself, either I stay here for the rest of myself or I do something about it. It also taught me that within life, we have people who make the decision to do something really well, and others who are just bystanders.
- There are 365 days in a year. The question I want you to ask yourself - are you living the same 1 day 365 times? Or are you living 365 days every year. If you want to achieve and be able to get things done and be the best possible self - fulfilling the potential of what Allah wants you to do - then you have to take yourself to a place of high performance. You will have had a day in your life where you have gone out there and said, I didn’t think I was capable of that, and you want to make sajdah to Allah. imagine that every day of your life. What does it feel like? In that moment when you achieve something so amazing that you want to make sajdah to Allah before you tell anyone else. You feel a real connection, amazing amount of joy and confidence. That comes from being consistent in living to form your full potential.
- We all know that we have it within us - but how do we grasp onto that? It requires a conscious decision from you. It's about living in the now. You have to be present in that moment to have that connection with the people around you and be conscious of them.
- When I die, rather than just meeting Allah, I can say to Him here’s my stuff, here’s some more, and here’s some more. That’s the difference between living in your past and living in your tomorrow. My tomorrow is not in this planet, but rather on the Judgement Day. That is very powerful for you to look forward to. At same time we need challenge. When you are busy in day to day life, it is really important for you to put some fun in your life. For me, the fun comes from challenging myself. What challenges me is that I could go in any moment, and I am in charge of my life. I want to make sure Allah is happy with me and that I am using the skills that He gave me.
- High performance is about taking ourselves to another level. To have clarity, energy, productivity, influence, and courage. There are 5 steps to attaining High Performance: Focus, Persuasion, Psychology, Body, Presence, and Purpose.
- FOCUS & PRESENCE
- First you have to develop Focus. When you are doing something, you are focused on just that thing.
- When you have a lot of stuff going on in your life people look at you like you are a superhuman. But I am not. I am the same as you. But I prioritize, I focus on one thing at a time, and stay in the moment.
- If you are writing an essay, how can you do it well and fast if your Facebook is open?
- If you are sitting with your husband and your cell phone is nearby, how can you give him your full potential?
- A 5 minute conversation with focus and presence with your child or husband, is more effective than sitting next to them for 2 hours watching TV.
- When you are praying, it could be just words coming out of your mouth, or it could be an actual conversation with Allah. That is why when you are praying, your phone should be turned off. This will give you the freedom to concentrate.
- I work in chunks: I block time and work out what my schedule will be. I allocate time to things that are important.
- When I am with my kids, I have to be with my kids only - nothing else.
- A great habit I started is that while I am making breakfast I make dinner at the same time, so I don’t have to worry about it for the rest day.
- I don’t buy into multi tasking, I call it multi-failing. When I am doing work I am not thinking about kids. When I am with my husband I am not talking about the kids. I am enjoying each part and focusing completely on each part.
- PERSUASION
- Second you have to know how to use the power of persuasion with others.
- How can you connect and engage with each person in your life?
- There are lots of challenging relationships where we can use persuasion.
- PSYCHOLOGY
- Third is to work on your inner voice. What we tell ourselves has an effect on us.
- In the morning I pray fajr, make dua, and ask myself what kind of day am I going to have today. I ask the kids too. And I don’t stop until they say it’s going to be amazing, fantastic day. That's how you set yourself up to have an amazing day.
- It’s about perspective: You are in control of your happiness.
- If you don't love yourself no one will love you.
- Having someone to check in with you and support you helps a lot. Find a person and tell them 'I need you to ask me in the morning what are the 3 things I am supposed to do today, and then in the end of the day check up on me.' Remind them that they will get ajr.
- If you really want to achieve what you are capable of, you have to get over self-criticism, tell yourself you have to keep going. You have to come out of yourself. When you stay inside yourself you don’t do these things. Make sure your inner voice is sending the right message, and move on.
- Procrastination - shaytan is really good in that. Say to yourself: 'If you have the skills and you are not doing it - then the shaytan is winning! So do I want to let shaytan win?' Telling yourself that will eliminate procrastination.
- BODY
- Fourth is to take care of your body: be well rested, nourished, and hydrated.
- The times when I didn't eat well, I didn't sleep enough, or didn't drink enough water are times when my relationship with Allah would be really poor. My Salats were not very good. That is written in my book.
- So I have to make sure I sort out my physiology as much as my psychology.
- When I have a headache, is it because I didn't drink enough water or because I am stressed? Find the cause instead of just taking a pill.
- If you don’t drink enough water, How is your brain going to work properly?
- If you don't take care of yourself how can you take care of others?
- PURPOSE
- Fifth is to define your purpose.
- To grow, to improve, to live different days every day of our life.
- And that is where real Ihsan comes from.
- Goal setting: make a 5 year strategic plan. Life is what you make it.
- How can I stay on purpose and serve greatly right now?
- Am I rested? Am I hydrated? Am I eating? Am I exercising?
- What is my mission today?
- What am I looking forward to?
- What must I accomplish today to progress my life and move my life forward?
- Am I actually developing influence?
- Am I practicing empathy when I want to influence others?
- In this moment, what level do I have in terms of my emotional presence?
- What else am I doing other than cooking and cleaning? You need to really be doing something with your life.
- If you keep asking yourself these questions it will help you improve in the 5 high performance areas.
Figuring out the best version of you
- There are two versions of you - the one that is here and the one that is the best version of you. That is who you are in competition with and that person will always be ahead of you.
- Spend 30 minutes, 3 times a day, and write about your best possible self. 6 months later you will be a better person.
- It will remove your fears.
- Make sure there are no distractions.
- At the end you can shred it and throw it away, it makes no difference.
Saiyyidah Zaidi Bio:
Winner NicheHero International Business Leadership Programme 2010. Masters in Applied Positive Psychology [Distinction]. Fellow of the Institute for Leadership and Management, UK. Fellow of the Association for Project Management, UK. Previous Director in UK Local Government. Meyler Cambell Certified Business Coach Programme Graduate. Graduate of Psychology Distilled for Business Coaches, Meyler Campbell. Member of the World Association of Business Coaches. External Executive Coach, EMBA at Cambridge Judge Business School. Post Graduate Diploma: Programme Directors Development Programme UCL [Distinction Graduate]. One of 150 Certified High Performance Coaches Globally. High Performance Women Graduate, Cambridge
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